I Like New York In June!

How about you?

No offense to the cast of Babes on Broadway, but well, quite frankly, I’d have to go with. . .no.  A very emphatic no.

You see, New York in June looks something like this:

or this:

Don’t let the gloominess fool you.  It’s hot.  

Warning:  I’m about to complain.  A lot.  I was raised to believe that to kvetch is human, and to kvetch well is an art.  But don’t worry.  I’m going to make an honest effort to put a positive spin on this whole very wet, very sticky situation.  Those of you who know me are thinking that being positive might make my head explode.  You’re right.  It could.  But just for all of you, I’m going to do my best to stay on the sunny side.

Ready?  O.k.

Complaint # 1:  It’s hot, and when I’m outside it feels like I’ve been thrown into a working dryer.

Positive Spin #1:  Hey, I don’t have to iron!  I can just pin a dryer sheet to my clothes and be done with it. Plus, the dryer sheet will guard against static cling, thus preventing me from sticking to sweaty, wet New Yorkers.

Complaint #2:  Walking the dog in this weather really sucks.

Positive Spin #2:  I don’t have to feel guilty for not walking him more, and the rain gives him something interesting to look at:

Besides, he looks absolutely adorable in his raincoat:

Complaint #3:  My hair is a frizzy mess.  (And there we have the understatement of the year.)

Positive Spin #3:  I don’t have to worry about doing anything special with my hair.  No matter what I do it’ll end up looking like a warped piece of modern art anyway.  So I can just tie it in a knot and forget about it.

Complaint #4:  All the storm watch stuff on the news is driving me up the wall.

Positive Spin #4:  I’m learning all about meteorology!  Well, that’s not totally positive, since I’m still confused about the difference between scattered and isolated thunder storms.  (Hey, I tried.)

You might be wondering if all that positive talk has made me rethink my take on New York in June.  

Well, no, I’m sorry to report that it hasn’t.  Now that I’ve been all bright and cheery on this oh so dreary day, it’s time for me to take some Aspirin and go back to my old ways.  

I’ll leave you with this thought: New York in July and August will probably be even worse than this.  

Wait.  Scratch that.  It would be very mean to leave you with that thought.  So instead, I’ll leave you with a video of Judy Garland singing the song I just so mercilessly mocked.